The Quantity of Mercy

“You are like me. We forgive nothing!”

Followed by the unctuous offer of a cookie, this was the wizened, wicked Don Corrado Prizzi’s proud assessment of his equally Machiavellian granddaughter, Maerose, in John Huston’s darkly funny mafia satire, Prizzi’s Honor, a truly under-appreciated comic gem.

To the Prizzis (and the Corleones, for that matter), forgiveness was for chumps, especially when family honor was at stake. Cross them once, and you could bet the vig that your name would be crossed off the rolls of the living.

When it to comes to the adage, “forgive and forget,” I’m not as absolute in it its rejection as the corrosive Corrado, but I’m not buying it wholesale, either.

So much has been made about the emotional healing power of forgiveness, not one but two annual “Forgiveness Days” are now observed. According to the various organizations that support these days and their mission, forgiveness doesn’t mean to forget, but does afford the offended peace of mind while taking the temptation of retribution off the table.

That’s fine as far as it goes, but my Shakespearean question is, how much is too much of a good thing?

Just as twenty-four of our state courts have adopted the “Three Strikes” law, I have my own scale of justice – “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”

Regrettably, I’ve had to invoke this personal code of honor twice this year and, unlike what some forgiveness fans will tell you, my soul is not being eaten up by anger nor do I have any burning desire for revenge. On the contrary, if I had given either party the chance to turn a double dose of the same transgression into a triple, that would have blown whatever peace of mind I can muster these days. Like the popular game show, life is a game of “Survivor.” If I have to vote you out of my tribe to preserve my dignity, guess whose torch is going to get snuffed?

Mae West once embellished the above line from “As You Like It” as follows, “Too much of a good thing is wonderful.”

To put my own spin on The Bard, “Too much forgiveness is unforgivable.”

Think I’ll have a cookie now.